Drink Rankings

Objective overview so you can make subjective decisions.

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Who pays the most in calories?

kcal — calories per 100ml

% — alcohol percentage

Eff — alcohol/calorie ratio

🥇

Liqueur

liqueur

25% alcohol

300

kcal

25.0%

alk

0.83

eff

🥈

Whisky

spirits

40% alcohol

250

kcal

40.0%

alk

1.60

eff

🥉

Jagermeister

spirits

35% alcohol, bitter liqueur

250

kcal

35.0%

alk

1.40

eff

Cognac

spirits

40% alcohol

239

kcal

40.0%

alk

1.67

eff

Vodka

spirits

40% alcohol

231

kcal

40.0%

alk

1.73

eff

Rum

spirits

40% alcohol

231

kcal

40.0%

alk

1.73

eff

Gin

spirits

40% alcohol

231

kcal

40.0%

alk

1.73

eff

Tequila

spirits

40% alcohol

231

kcal

40.0%

alk

1.73

eff

Aperol

liqueur

11% alcohol, bitter aperitif

150

kcal

11.0%

alk

0.73

eff

Mulled wine

wine

12% alcohol, warm spiced wine

kcal

12.0%

alk

1.26

eff

Wine

wine

12% alcohol, red/white

kcal

12.0%

alk

1.41

eff

Sparkling wine

sparkling

12% alcohol, champagne

kcal

12.0%

alk

1.50

eff

Long drink

mixed

5.5% alcohol

kcal

5.5%

alk

0.85

eff

IPA/Craft beer

beer

6.5% alcohol, craft beer

kcal

6.5%

alk

1.08

eff

Cider

cider

4.5% alcohol

kcal

4.5%

alk

0.90

eff

Beer

beer

5% alcohol, 500ml can

kcal

5.0%

alk

1.16

eff

Efficiency = (alcohol content × 1000) ÷ calories. Higher number = more bang for fewer consequences. Theoretically.

"Healthier" choices

If you care about calories, choose hard liquor (vodka, whiskey) in small amounts with soda water or ice. Note: "healthy alcohol" is an oxymoron.

Calorie bombs

Liqueurs and sweet cocktails are the most caloric — sugar adds calories but not "efficiency". So: double the damage, half the fun.

Drink Rankings

Liqueur

Whisky

Jagermeister

Cognac

Vodka

Rum

Gin

Tequila

Aperol

Mulled wine

Wine

Sparkling wine

Long drink

IPA/Craft beer

Cider

Beer

"Healthier" choices

Calorie bombs

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